I had a boyfriend who told me that if I got a face piercing, I would lose my beauty. I would no longer be attractive to him. Whoa right? And these kinds of comments were casually flung around frequently, so much so I become insecure with myself and felt like I would never be good enough… at anything. And today as that needle broke through my skin, it felt like a big “FUCK YOU” straight to him and his beauty standards and expectations. I felt like I was reclaiming a piece of me that was compromised in that relationship. I feel free from the negativity I let tear me down.
And this is healing
Pendola Laundry Room Part 2
So. Basically. I thought he was being all aloof and distant because he lost interest in me. But actually. He does like me (His words) But…He has a girlfriend. HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Pendola laundry room
He asked me what was wrong and I asked to talk. How can I explain that I am bad at explaining things via text message via text message?
I have a lot of mean things I want to say. About how this is not me. Because I am actually pretty smart and I am not the kind of girl to wait in laundry rooms for boys at 2 fucking am.
But maybe it is the way he held me and made promises. I put my heart on a line and he mistreated it. I am sitting here because I want to tell him it’s okay. I want to let him know it is okay he disappointed me, that it is okay and we can still be friends.
"The best part of a relationship is getting to call the person, or lay down next to them, and tell them all the crazy things that happened to you all day long. In the end that’s what it’s about. It’s not about sex, it’s not about the money they give you, it’s not about how good looking they are, it’s about them listening to you talk for hours and hours and hours, about stupid shit that doesn’t matter."
People get drunk
They hook up with the wrong person
And pretend to be okay
People act tough
And get mad
People will do anything to distract their heart.
They will do anything to distract it from missing someone.
"I either eat too much or starve myself. Sleep for 14 hours or have insomniac nights. Fall in love very hard or hate passionately. I don’t know what grey is. I never did."
”It’s not easy for people to understand my discomfort with the spotlight, they say, ‘Why would you become an actor if you feel that way?’People don’t know what to do with those feelings, they feel you’re ungrateful, and that does kind of kill me. You can’t be saying, ‘You’re wrong about me,’ the worst thing is if you remotely sound like you’re complaining. Then you become the misconception.
hOW IS SHE NOT OUT
Something about this damn female
(Source: stewcharm, via converse8)